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Friday, September 30, 2011

Eksee MaXhosa! (Eastern Cape News)

This is an email I got from my brother, still one of the best jokes out there....

A Xhosa was sitting with an Afrikaaner and a Venda in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled barrel of beer, when all of a sudden the Police entered and arrested them. They were initially given a death Sentence but, as it was a national holiday, the sheikh decided they should be released after each receiving 20 lashes of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the sheikh said, "It's my first wife's birthday today and she asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping, but you cannot wish not to be whipped!"   The Venda thought for a second then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back before
whipping." This was done but the pillow lasted 10 lashes. The Afrikaaner saw this and said: "Please tie two pillows to my back before whipping." This was done and lasted for the whole 20 lashes. The Xhosa saw this, but before he could make his wish, the sheikh said: "As you are from the Eastern Cape with all the poverty and you share the same ethnicity with the first real president of South Africa, you are permitted to have two wishes!"   The Xhosa thought for a second, then said: "Thank you, most royal and merciful highness. My first wish is to receive 100 lashes with the strongest, toughest whip available." "If you so desire," the sheikh replied with a questioning look on his face, "and your second wish?" "Tie the Afrikaaner to my back." This was done ease.......

My First Blog

I just remembered that this is in fact NOT my first blog, neither is Examination Time, so i broke my blog-ginity (YES its a word, if it wasn't, now it is... try to keep up with the new terms) a few years back. My old blog was vludidi.spaces.live.com, and I thought vuyisani.blogspot.com was long.

Recently I just found out Live Spaces is no longer in service and they've collaborated with WordPress.com.... long story short my blog was deleted. But, the good news is, little snipets of my blog still appear on google search (I don't know if that is a good or a bad thing).

The point is I am going to post 1 of my former blogposts, because i think its worth a read, and its a joke which was not written by me, it was one of those email things.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Oktoberfest

Untitled

Yes, the Oktoberfest is upon us once again… I don’t know why I was excited (I say was because so far it feels like nothing I expected). I grew up in Mthatha where the only entertainment was the Boswell Wilkie Circus, which came like once a year… there’s an interesting story about that… but that's a story for another blog.

Back to the beerfest, so i expected that you pay an entry fee and then you drink ‘til you are on your knees… or entry is free and beer is at discounted prices…. and them being held mostly at breweries, i expect the beer to be atleast cheaper, from the poster alongside I do not get that impression. Instead I get the feeling that at a pub whereby you’d ordinarily enter for free and buy your poison, you know have to pay and admission fee and pay the same prices you would on any other day.

UntitledNow I’ve never been to Paulaner Braunhaus before so I might be wrong on some or all my points but, who cares. The part I found most interesting in this poster is the price (I am a student and I am allowed to complain about the price). R50 and you get a voucher for a beer worth R30… maybe its because I’m failing math but what happened to the R20. At first I thought it was to pay the live performers of something like that, but then they go on to charge you R50 before a performance by an international act, Like I can speak German.

To my conclusion, what I was tryna say is, if what i perceive about beerfests is true then I’d rather go to the shebeen, a stone throw away from the school.

  • The prices are cheap compared to pubs and clubs
  • There’s a variety of beer to buy
  • Transport is not an issue, I can always walk back to my bed
  • There’s always a person you know, if not the people are friendly, you can always join a group of strangers as long as you got beer money, and they’ll take care of you coz you they need you to come back and buy them more beer
  • And its always packed and there’ll be a “That Guy”, just be careful not to be “That Guy”

Well until I find a Beerfest (or Bierfest, in Germany) that caters for students… I’d rather go to a Shebeen